Guest Post by DJ Syn City
“Fake it til you make it”
Obsessed with perception.
I often feel that people have the wrong idea of the catchphrase “Fake It ‘Til You Make It”. Especially in Hollywood. Actually, this misconception exist everywhere. That is why you will see many “unknown” people on the red carpet posing for who knows what. That is why women sleep with rich men so they can drive in luxury cars, buy Louboutin shoes, have their boobs done or shots for their assets, even though they are sleeping on their girlfriend’s couch and/or are unhappy inside.
That is why men lie about their power, brag about how much money they make, who they know, but are really another celebrity’s lacky, acting like they are themselves established but the money they are spending are their grand-parent’s mortgage. That is why athletes go broke within 3 years after they are retired, balling it out like they have Michael Jordan or Tiger Woods brand money. That is why actors and musicians are depressed with all the pressure of keeping up with the appearance of the “Rich & Famous” lifestyle.
Yes, I am aware that some of “your” cars being leased or rented just to impress people which is backwards in my opinion but I do have the understanding that the superficial attracts business, although longevity-wise, they don’t care about what you drive, they just want good business. As far as impressing “friends” or love interest, wouldn’t you rather them liking you for you?
The economy as we all know, even though it has improved, isn’t how it use to be like in the 90′s or 80′s. Entertainment went digital, record labels are downsized, mega-movie budget projects are a handful, magazines are now blogs and dot coms, etc. Hello? Like my mother would always nag me to do: “Learn how to save!”. She does have a point. Have a bit of dignity, get a real job.
Wait until you are promoting a project or product or even have a publicist before you step on that red carpet. Have a real purpose. Telling the truth is easier than lying. Lying can be much work because you have to remember them and can get caught eventually. It can also be quite embarrassing when that happens.
I personally ride buses, trains, cabs, get a ride from a friend, and sometimes hire a cheap hooptie driver to get to my gigs. When I tell people my choice of transportation, their eyes grow bigger in disbelief like it’s an act of crime to do so. In New York, Millionaires daily commute in subways and cabs. Why is it such a big deal in another city like Los Angeles?
Maybe it’s because they’ve read my resume of the who’s who list and biggest corporate brands as my clients and think that I have it made. Reality is: just because you see famous people around me, or once in awhile, see me scoring a “huge” event gig, it doesn’t translate into wealth.
Don’t get me wrong, I know my talent’s worth and can’t complain that wow, I am making a living off of my passions and heck, sometimes my clients do send me a security/lincoln car driver and compensate me with a nice check but it is in its beginning stage of greater success. How do I know? My insane work ethic and dedication for over 15 years in the entertainment business. Ask anybody that really know me. From my high school dance / theater art school teacher or peers to people I’ve worked with in the past. Everybody has a story but one day, I will tell mines to the world via autobiography and perhaps biopic because I’d like to inspire others just like some inspired me to be who I am today.
I’ve had my ups and downs but believe you me, once (or twice) you had little to nothing, been through hell and back, sold yourself short repeatedly, you learn from it, grow from it, and all the heartaches definitely builds a character out of you and yep, a thick skin. Have I lied before? Yes. Many times. Did it feel good? Sometimes it did initially but at the end, not really.
Back to ”Fake It ‘Til You Make It”. The real meaning of the catchphrase is about confidence. We all have it in us but we all fear in what others think of us at some degree, some more so than others. In turn, it results acts of insecurities making us “pretend” to be, or become a “somebody”. That “somebody” meaning what society and the media would consider “successful” or “cool”. Who am I to judge right? To each its own. We all dress to impress, do things we hate to please others, but how far will you go is the question.
At the end of the day, you will have to live with yourself, and maybe have a family, or be a mentor to others. Do what feels good to you now…and LATER! Make the people that have raised you and the people you care about proud. Lead an example for your offsprings, blood-related or not. Leave a legacy. Be you. It’s just easier. And confidence is all about belief within. It is self-actualization.
I am no expert nor perfect but I hope this post inspired you for the better.
Catherine “DJ SynCity” Ouellette.
“Fake it til you make it” (also called “act as if“) is a common catchphrase that means to imitate confidence so that as the confidence produces success, it will generate real confidence. The purpose is to avoid getting stuck in a self fulfilling prophecy related to one’s fear of not being confident, e.g., by thinking, “I can’t ask that girl out because she would sense my lack of confidence.” The article How You Too Can Be an Optimist in Prevention points out, “In research at Wake Forest University, for example, scientists asked a group of 50 students to act like extroverts for 15 minutes in a group discussion, even if they didn’t feel like it. The more assertive and energetic the students acted, the happier they were”.